Monday, July 13, 2009
Going through the grieving process...
There is a complete grieving process. These five stages are not in order as everyone goes through this process as needed. The five stages are:
Denial & Isolation
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance
When is it unhealthy for a person to grieve? At what stage of this process do you tell someone, "you have taken this process so far you are being destructive to yourself and to those around you"?
Is there such a thing as taking the process way to far ... Yes, I believe there is. This is my personal feelings and I will tell you why.
A few years ago, actually over 3 years ago, someone very close to me, lost his mother. On top of this lost his company. Yes, I expected this person to go through the grieving process fully, that is a super hard thing to deal with, especially for a man,. Ego's are built around what a man earns and how well he is able to care for his family, protect them and what he does earn is a reflection of how he feels about himself. It's a proud thing for a man.. When you combine this with the loss of a parent, it's a double hit. If you are not strong inside, able to deal with the emotions, trouble is just around the bend.
This same man with in 3 years, cheated on his wife, lied to his wife and carried on an affair until he was caught red handed.. Of course, when he was confronted with the truth of his affair, he denied this completely and then blamed his wife. Now during this time he was caught, the wife and him both agreed to seek out counseling. It was months later after the sessions started that the wife realized her husband had not cut off the affair and was then devastated again by the lies. The husband said he would cut things off and he did but it took some real doing, with the wife talking a lot and working through things. From this stage of the process of grief then came the depression where the husband would retreat to a room in the house and just veg out all day long for months, leaving the wife to care for bills, shopping, the children and the family pets. Once this process had reached a peak, then came the anger. She and her child were almost hit with a chair, the death threats came from her husband, the yelling, the blaming, the anger was full force. Now the wife is over 3 years through this process and the relationship has all but been ruined by the husbands unhealthy ways of dealing with the grieving process. His moods swayed between happy and so depressed and anger that their was nothing right the wife could ever say, no matter what she said or did, she was blamed, spoken to so very rudely that after awhile, the wife just gave up trying to help. On top of all of this, their child got very sick, so the wife was up most nights tending to an ill child and being treated horrible by her husband when he felt like yelling or blaming her for his own feelings he did.
Soon the wife had had enough and ask the husband to pack and leave. She figured that a years worth of therapy did not help, she was unable to help him and she grew tired of being in a very unhealthy relationship. Not only this, but she had to come to the fact that the person she married had allowed himself to change for the worse, she too was suffering from a loss, her own husband and family.
Does a person know when they have really gone too far by allowing themselves to totally flip out and go off the deep end.
What do you think?
| And you said; |
Thursday, July 9, 2009
It's hot in here....
One way to cool off a car seat is to allow the air conditioner to run just a few moments to allow the air inside to circulate prior to placing your child inside their car seat. Another way to quickly cool down a car seat is to whip it down with a cool cloth, then dry. Do not rinse your car seat with water, but just wipe it down with cold water on a towel or rag. This will help cool the car seat down enough that the inside of the car seat quickly cools off.
Remember to wipe down any metal parts as well, as those parts can become very hot quickly as the heat inside the car can raise with in moments with the windows up.
NEVER leave your child inside a car while it is running or while it is turned off and windows down, temperatures inside the car can raise in moments causing a the core temperature of a child to raise very quickly.
Remember, if you have a routine during your morning.. and you are worried if your routine would change that you could possibly forget about your child in the back seat, especially a child who is sleeping or an infant. Our NEW neon sticky notes will be available soon so you can place these on your rear view mirror inside your car.. or on the center of your steering wheel to remind yourself you have a little rider in the back seat.
OUR Neon sticky notes are bright in color and will remind you to LOOK in the back seat. These neon sticky notes will be available on our website in a few weeks, will be patent pending.. and are intended to help parents remember to check the car seat in the back seat, especially if you have a rear facing car seat.
Please have a safe summer and remember when it's hot outside, it's even hotter inside your automobile.
Have a question, please feel free to leave us a comment so we can respond, or check us out on our website,
http://www.BabyHuggables.com
| And you said; |
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
MJ Changed the MTV world of music
In 1983 Michael Jackson changed the doors concerning MTV. Priorto this, there was no blacks allowed.. MJ, and his recording producer
said, unless you allow MJ to perform his music on MTV, we will go public
with your racism and let the world know how MTV is really run. We will
pull all funding from MTV. Soon after this, during the release of "Thriller"
Billy Jean hit MTV and was played over and over again.
Billy Jean the song, was based on a true story of MJ, a fan had insisted he
fathered her twins and wanted to let MJ know. This fan sent all sort of mail
to MJ, enough that MJ had nightmares at times just thinking that someone
this sick could be doing this to him.
It was not until this fan, sent MJ a letter telling him that she wanted both MJ and herself to kill each other at the same time and the baby. Later MJ found out this fan had a mental problem.
One of the pictures this fan sent, MJ had framed and hung above the family dinning table. Despite MJ's mothers disaproval. The picture hung in memory of what fans will do to get the attention of a star, someone like MJ.
The words to Billy Jean are true, so listen to the song the next time you hear it and think about all the stuff in MJ's daily world he had to endure just to bring us his talent, his dance, his performance, his music, his words.
Billy Jean almost did not make it on the Thriller album, no one really thought the song was that good.. but MJ had his own say so in the song Title and the words to the song. Billy Jean went on to be a super wide hit not only in the USA but outside the USA.
Michael Jackson changed the world as we knew it, with his every changing music, dance and performace, he was magic when he hit the stage every single time.
I am personally going to really miss MJ, he left us with something to hold on to, think about, dream about and learn from for eternity and beyond..
What was your fondest memory of Michael Jackson or as I called, MJ.
| And you said; |
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Tribute to M. Jackson
I remember growing up, M.Jackson was just 6 years older then myself, listening to his music from those first times he hit the stage, what I can remember. Then when I was around 19, 20 watching MTV.. and seeing M.Jackson over and over again on those video's. I can remember that the apartment complex I lived in, played MTV but I could not get it on my own TV, they didn't offer it at the time.. this is so far back.. but seems like yesterday.
My sister and myself would head up to the apartment clubhouse, she is 3 years younger then I, plop down on the big stuffed couch along with several other younger people and open a can of soda and watch MTV for hours thinking this was the coolest thing to watch EVER.. M.J. would appear over and over again, watching him sing, dance and that smile and those white teeth and lets not forget about the hair.. ever changing hair styles..
Later in life I attended a M.J. look alike contest where kids got up on stage all dressed in M.J. attire and would wear the black hat, the one white glove and the audience was able to VOTE who was the best look alike M.Jackson.. we cheered as the moon walk and black shoes glided across the screen, the slight tip of the black hat. Some were really super wonderful to watch and had all the right moves down to a "T", while others vocals were a mere simulation of the actual M.Jackson himself.
I remember thinking in those early years, everyone gets old, including myself.. wonder what life will be like then... well here it is some 35 plus years later and I think there are some like M.Jackson, Elvis Presley, Farrah Fawcett, Anna Nicole, and so forth, that just some how leave us in there prime so we will always remember who they were and they can live on in our memories as they were intended too..
We lost 3 wonderful people this past week:
Ed McMan
Farrah Fawcett
M. Jackon
What are your memories of these wonderful people.?
| And you said; |
Friday, May 29, 2009
Lost in electronic communication
How did we manage to get through life with out all of this electronic devises?
I can remember when I was younger out riding my banana seat bike (I am giving my age away here) that if I came home, no one was there... I was to get out a piece of paper and pencil and write down where I was going called "leaving a note".. does anyone do this any more?
Have we all become so electronically trained that we have forgotten how to use the simple things in life?
How do we all manage to keep up with all these electronic means of communicating to one another on a daily basis? I am going to list a few that I know of, feel free to add to the list if you can think of any more.
Podcast, Cell Phones, Texting, Email, Facebook, Twitter, Skype...
| And you said; |
Friday, April 17, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
You can Be an Angel on Earth
Almost everyone finds themselves with at least a few hours of free time every month and is looking for a fulfilling way in which to spend them. Fill your empty hours, be an “Angel on Earth“, give a lot joy to someone in need and receive a genuine sense of accomplishment.
In May 2004 be an "Earth Angel on Earth". Add oxygen to our air and beautify our earth by planting a tree, bush or small flower garden in the front yard of a friend, neighbor or loved one who for financial or health reasons can not.
In June 2003 be a "Patriotic Angel on Earth". Hang an American flag in front of the home of a friend, neighbor or loved one who for financial or health reasons can not.
In July 2003 be a "Domestic Angel on Earth". Spend a day cleaning the home of a friend, neighbor or loved one who due to age or health reasons could really use your help.
In August 2003 be a “Summer Angel on Earth”. Mix up a batch of lemonade and share it on the front porch of or in the back yard of a friend, neighbor or loved one who could use some company and loves to talk about the good old days.
In September 2003 be a “Back to School Angel on Earth”. Collect and distribute clothing to children who need new clothes for school and whose parents find themselves unable to provide them. This is a great project you can get your church and entire community involved in.
In October 2003 be an “Autumn Angel on Earth”. Rake the leaves in the front and/or back yard of a friend, neighbor or loved one who due to age or health problems could really use your help.
In November 2003 be a “Thanksgiving Angel on Earth”. Donate a few hours to a soup kitchen and help feed those who could really use a good warm meal.
In December 2003 be a “Snow Angel on Earth”. Shovel the snow off of the sidewalk and/or driveway of a friend, neighbor or loved one who for age or health reasons could really use your help. If you live in a warmer climate, where there is no snow, then sweep a sidewalk and/or driveway.
In January 2004 be a “Messenger Angel on Earth”. Hand make or purchase get well cards and mail or deliver them to mail boxes of people who are home bound in your church and neighborhood.
In February 2004 be a “Valentine Angel on Earth”. Bake a heart shaped cake or cookies and bring along with a beverage to the home of a friend, neighbor or loved. Share some time with someone who would otherwise be all alone on Valentine’s day.
In March 2004 be a “Big Sister or Brother Angel on Earth”. Spend the day with your brother or sister helping him/her complete a project he/she just hasn’t been able to find the time to do. If you have no siblings, choose a friend.
In April 2004 be a “ Neighborhood Angel on Earth”. Walk up and down the streets of your local neighborhood, collect and properly dispose of absentmindedly dropped trash. This is a great project for the entire neighborhood to get involved in.
Pass this article along to all the members of your family and friends and hopefully the number of “Angels on Earth” will grow all across the nation as well as great joy in the hearts of those who give and those who receive.
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Elaine Stephen is a work at home Christian Mom who writes true stories and original poems on her blog Inspirational Christian Stories, Poems, Gifts at http://inspirationalgifts.blogspot.com that help us to open our hearts, minds and eyes to see God's presence and his blessings in our everyday lives. Elaine also sells inspirational gifts that express God’s word, Christ's sacrifice and inspire Christian love, comfort and joy from her Inspirational Gift Gallery web site at http://storesonline.com/site/inspirationalgift.
| And you said; |
Good Deeds for the New Year
Help Your Children Plan Their Good Deeds for the New Year
It is so important to teach our children to give freely of themselves and to be thankful for the blessings bestowed upon them. But how do we teach them, keep track of the events and be prepared in time? Create an Annual Children’s Good Deeds Calendar!
Take a brand new calendar for the upcoming year. Go through the calendar with your children and circle the date of a holiday or just select an appropriate date each month and decide on a good deed that, with a little help from you, your child can easily perform. If your children are having trouble coming up with their own ideas, here are some suggestions:
January - It’s a New Year with New Babies in Need! - Call your local hospital and find out what articles they take for donation of babies born to low income families and infants going out for adoption. When my husband and I adopted my son (abandoned by his birth Mom), we were given a lovely hand knitted cap for the baby. Your children can select (from a dollar store) some baby bibs, caps, sleepers, pacifiers, teething rings, etc. If your children are older, you can help them make some appropriate items. Select a day in the 1st week of the new year to deliver your items to the hospital.
February -Valentine’s Day - So many of our older citizens are alone in nursing homes during the month of love. Your children can show these folks they are loved! Call a nursing home to make arrangements, spend an hour visiting with the elders and distributing handmade Valentine’s Day cards.
March - The 1st Day of Spring - I’m sure you know a neighbor or family member who could use a little help in the garden. If not call your local county for information on a program in your area that beautifies the neighborhood. Plant a few flowers and do some weeding to brighten the way!
April - Easter - Let your child share the true meaning of Easter with friends at an Easter party. Mom reads the story from a children’s Bible. Then each child is assigned to draw one part of the Easter story. 1. The Last Supper, 2. Christ praying to God in Gethsemane, 3. Christ with a crown of thorns, 4. Christ carrying the cross, 5. Christ on the cross, 6. Jesus rising from the tomb. Each child draws their assigned picture six times with crayons or markers on construction paper. Then the children all share their pages and create their own book with a hole puncher and yarn ties. Then the children sit in a circle and each child gets to tell what their part of the story, according to the page they drew, means to them. Of course then you eat lunch and for desert you serve cross shaped Easter candy instead of rabbits and eggs and each child gets to take home their “True Meaning of Easter” book to share with their own family.
May 4th National Day of Prayer - As a family, a few days before, make up a list of people and situations for which the power of prayer can assist our country. Write the prayer together as a family and the children can share it at Sunday school. The prayer can include the president, our servicemen, etc. Say the prayer together as a family at dinner time while holding hands.
June - The 1st Day of Summer - Have a yard/garage sale of all those old toys and things that Mom and Dad don’t use anymore. Donate the proceeds to a favorite charity.
July - Independence Day - Visit a Veteran’s home (make arrangements), bring homemade lemonade and ask the Veteran’s questions. This is a great way for children to learn about the sacrifices our Veteran’s made for our independence.
August 22nd - Be an Angel Day - Your child can be an anonymous Guardian Angel by selecting a good deed to do for someone, completing the task when they are not around, and leaving behind a handmade “Your Guardian Angel is Watching Over You” card behind. The card can be made a head of time but the deed has to be selected on that day. It will be up to your child to recognize and perform the deed. Some examples to get your children thinking are:
1. Lugging the heavy garbage cans from the side of the house to the street for the elderly lady who struggles to do so.
2. Stacking the pile of firewood the delivery man dumped in the driveway neatly beside the house for the elderly gentleman across the street.
3. Making up a picnic basket lunch of non perishables like canned tuna fish, a small loaf of bread, a small jar of mayo, a small jar of pickles and a bottle of juice and leaving it on the doorstep of a family in need.
September - The 1st Day of Autumn - I’m sure you know a neighbor or family member who could use a little help in the yard. If not call your local county for information on a program in your area that beautifies the neighborhood. Rake leaves and pick up debris to brighten the way!
October - Breast Cancer Month - Make pink ribbons to sell at school, church and in the neighborhood and donate the proceeds to breast cancer research or treatment center.
November - Thanksgiving - Have your children write a special thank you letter to someone who did something really nice for them. You child can select a family member, Sunday school teacher or friend. This is a great way to get children really thinking about the blessings bestowed upon them and how important it is to let people know how much you appreciate them.
December - Christmas is for Giving - All year the children fill a jar or can with the families pennies. Right before Christmas the children cash the pennies in at the bank for dollar bills Then they buy toys and donate them to Toys for Tots or a similar charity or orphanage.
Creating a Good Deeds for the New Year calendar is a fun project that is sure to become an annual tradition, a tradition that hopefully will be passed on down through the generations to come.
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Elaine Stephen is a work at home Christian Mom who writes true stories and original poems on her blog Inspirational Christian Stories, Poems, Gifts at http://inspirationalgifts.blogspot.com that help us to open our hearts, minds and eyes to see God's presence and his blessings in our everyday lives. Elaine also sells inspirational gifts that express God’s word, Christ's sacrifice and inspire Christian love, comfort and joy from her Inspirational Gift Gallery web site at http://storesonline.com/site/inspirationalgift.
| And you said; |



